The Kingdom Way to Breathe...

I have been encountering God in the deep lately.  

As in, literally, in the deep... 

And the irony is not lost on me. 
You see, I have this fear of deep waters. I'm not sure where it came from but I have always battled a fear of water. 

I LOVE the beach and find peace and rest on a shore - whether it be ocean, inlet, or riverbank... but take me out to where my feet won't reach the bottom, well... (Cue "Oceans" song here...) I'm not a fan.

I get a little twitchy with a case of side-eye and I may hyperventilate or be prone to desperate bouts of praying in the Spirit (--which spirit, it's hard to tell.)

I am so aware that I am not in control and that I am being forced to trust. That whole sense of adventure and play evaporates like good intentions on a slow, sunny, summer afternoon!

So the fact that He is calling us out into the Deep... well, it stretches me --but I can never say no to Him! 

Oh - I can want to... but He's just so convincingly Good...

Happy - a Five Minute Friday post

Oh man, it was great to be back in the flow of the fun that is #fmfparty over on Twitter!

This is Kate's 2yr Anniversary of hosting Five Minute Friday over at her blog and so don't forget to head on over to her place, too!

This is Five Minute Friday (- a five minute timed free write) and our One Word Prompt for the day is:HAPPY

{GO}

Because, of course!  

I already wrote about Happiness this week, but honestly --it's not like any of us couldn't use a little MORE Happy, right?

It's not like there is TOO MUCH Happy going around right about now!

Even for me... one who has a bent for being joyful and positive, this season of heavy and dark can weigh me down and pull me to corners of weariness and shadows.

The Happiness Dare - Everyone Should Play Along, Because Who Couldn't Use a Lot More Happy?

It's summertime and you guys know how I love to sit on my patio and read all the things! You also may have noticed that I have been writing fewer words lately... keeping my thoughts and opinions close to the heart and quiet. 

If I'm honest (...and I am that!) part of the reason for my silence is because, well... I am tired, y'all!  And after weeks and weeks of feeling a bit too run down, I began to wonder if maybe my Joy was... um, lacking?  

Enter The Happiness Dare...

This book, friends... because God is smart and Jennifer is kindred, this book fell into my hands at just the right time! I love them both oh so much! 

Hidden in the Rock... a Five Minute Friday post.

Oh how I have missed y'all! 

Summer. Am I right? 
But here's the thing: I haven't even left town or been doing anything super fun. I have been writing less over the past month, working on Resting - in more ways than one, and giving myself a bit of grace for the summer.  

But I have missed hanging out on Twitter on Thursday nights with my tribe from Five Minute Fridays!  As I mentioned recently, the heart of this tribe still beats strong and if you lean in and listen close, you will hear it. You will find encouragement and support and you will hear the faint whisperings of, "You can do this! You are a writer! You are not alone..."  And, honestly, who doesn't need that reminder every once in awhile --read: every Thursday night?

This is Five Minute Friday (- a five minute timed free write) and our One Word Prompt for the day is:HIDDEN

{GO}

I know what it's like to be hidden.  To be shelved, set aside, pushed back, to hunker down and to be told to wait.

It's not fun. That is what it is: not fun - but oh so necessary!

Created to Create... How to Live Beyond the Fear of Failure

So I have been, I suppose, summering a bit this week.  Less inside and staring at screens (Amen!) and more outside, relaxing in shade! (Hallelujah!)

Still, the Lord is always speaking and while we have been experiencing large gaps of silence -He and I--, one of the things He has been whispering soft to me is about how we see Success and Failure, and how that often puts a stop to our creativity!

In classic Five Minute Friday form... (Even though I am almost a week late!) We’ll start this post like this, raw and unedited:

The One Word Prompt for the FMF this week is: CREATE

{GO}

I have had The Undoing by Steffany Gretzinger on repeat for weeks now.  

You know how there are some songs or entire albums that seem to release a sound or a message that is so needed in certain seasons? Well... that.

Specifically, it has been (Come) "Out of Hiding"... 

This song, y'all. It lives up to the album title because truly, it undoes me, every. single. time. 

It has me at the first line:

"Come out of hiding. You're safe here with Me..." 

How To Build A {New} Life: Take Notice of the Light

"Rest isn't inactivity. Rest, to me, is a place of total trust."   ~Bill Johnson

So good, right? And that is where I have been lately (and why I am not sitting in this chair quite as much!)

Still - you know how I love freewriting and my Five Minute Friday tribe... and also this: God showed up and showed off in such a unique way this week, I couldn't NOT write about it... even if just for five minutes!

The One Word Prompt for the FMF this week is: BUILD

{GO}

I don't know how many of you may know or remember that my One Word for 2016 is Change.  Let's just keep that in mind as we move forward here today.

Change.

I have dreaded it... I have fought it hard, only to lean in in surrender and learn to anticipate it, drenched in hope.

I have preached it time and time again --how kicking against it is fruitless but how embracing it with arms wide open makes for a harvest of goodness.

But I have not always lived it.

I am still learning...

For months now, I have noticed an unusual amount of Dragonfly sightings.  So much so that I have told both my girlie and my Honey that I need to look into what they mean. But I get home and I forget all about it.

There is an abundance of them surrounding me - sometimes one at a time in a parking lot or in flight around my car. Sometimes I find --wait for it, a 'beauty' (group) of them along a walk down through the Canyon or up around the orchards. But never have I encountered them like I did a few days ago!

On Monday, change came at us full force and stormy... a bit unsteady and spinning.

The Importance of Protecting Your Marriage...

It has been over a week since I have sat in this chair, staring at this screen, and tried to find words.  Lately, He's calling me to Silence and the flow of writing is slower, shall we say. Because of that, and because He is still calling me to a 'glorious lack of productivity' (His words... not yet mine!) I am linking up with all the places, so this post will graciously be --or at least start!-- in classic Five Minute Friday form.

I have missed you, but it turns out that God didn't want me to just WRITE about Rest. He wasn't asking me to just remind you guys again and again, but He was wanting me to literally slow and stop and actually do the work of entering in to His Rest for a time! 

How many know and can attest that sometimes it really IS work to enter in?

It was like a little mini refresher course of what I learned during my Summer of Silence and there is freedom in remembering that social media or the internet is not the boss of us!

In my Resting... He is reminding me of the importance of protecting the relationships that mean the most to us - and to Him (...and how we best go about doing that!)

I'll give you a hint: it includes expressing thankfulness, speaking life, and knowing (and remembering) who you really are! 

This enables you to bring your best self to the table!

Looking for Small Wonders and Counting Gifts...

Last Friday I wrote about Rest real quick like, before I ran out the door and hit the road running... in search of a little R&R while doing some dream team strategery (read: planning) for the year ahead at Dad's House.

The irony was not lost on me.

When the Lord is not being Oh. So. Obvious. in His attempt to capture my attention and slow. me. down. again, back to the rhythm of rest, then He is reminding me of one of the best ways to do that... by counting gifts!

Seriously - in the last couple of months, these are a few of the books He has put in front of me... 

When God Just Keeps Saying the SAME Thing... Rest - a Five Minute Friday post

You know how it goes... {Insert Gushing Comment about my tribe over at #fmfparty on Twitter and the whole Five Minute Friday Community here.}

This is Five Minute Friday (- a five minute timed free write) and our One Word Prompt for the day is: REST

{GO}

I can't seem to escape this word... or of the need for it to manifest in my life.

Rest... we all need it!  

We hunger and thirst for it even --but it's not loud and it will not shout for our attention.

It's easy to put it off... push it aside... or think we are immune to needing it.  

It's not something this world offers freely and it will not happen on accident!  

True rest is intentional and slow... it seeps down deep to water our roots and often it's only when we find ourselves bone dry and dying of thirst that we notice our need of it!

How to Diffuse One of the Enemies Most Valuable Weapons

Don't you just love how God will use anything... and I mean any. thing. to reveal His love and draw us closer?

I was talking with a few friends this past week who are in a season that they are not really fond of and here's the thing: If you're not there now... well, let's be real... you will be (again) one day! 

All of us have gone through hard seasons, harsh darkness, heavy circumstances that we would've rather not had to go through!

I was telling a friend just this morning that a part of me longs for the 'good old days' of my Summer of Silence. 

I know, right? If you were around back then you may remember that I was not so much loving it as it was happening! 

And yet... In this season of full and busy, I find myself longing for the slow and quiet. And then He quickly reminds me that He taught me how to tap into slow and quiet both in the silence AND in the midst of full and busy (Apparently, He taught me that, you know, for a reason!)

Don't Lose Heart... a Five Minute Friday post

I made it, y'all! I made it on time and stayed for most of the party and it was so nice to be back! Some of the players (aka writers) have changed... I don't think we have talked about Nutella for awhile, and there has been less hashtagging it up (but I plan on bringing that back) and we haven't had a Ninja (Crystal Stine) stop by for awhile... but the heart of this tribe still beats strong and if you lean in and listen close, you will hear it... You can do this! You are a writer! You are not alone! (And who doesn't need that reminder every once in awhile --read: every Thursday night?)

This is Five Minute Friday (- a five minute timed free write) and our One Word Prompt for the day is: LOSE

{GO}

My first thought is, "Don't lose heart..." but this week, y'all? Am I right? 

I wrote about #Orlando a bit here and I have been being intentional this week in not losing heart... in not growing weary... in practicing Self-Care and Rest and giving myself room to process, to heal, to breathe.

If you follow me on social media at all (or even stop by this little corner of the interwebs here!) you will see that I am in love and have all the swoony, romantic feels for my Hydrangeas! They take my breath away with their beauty!

When It's Vital (and Humbling) To Know Who He Says You Are

This world, y'all... it is heartbreaking and brutal and it can seem like it is spinning right out of control.

We can tap into the heaviness and let the darkness talk us into believing that evil is closing in on us on every side. We are easily convinced because, well - the darkness is dark and it spreads like oil, oozing on to everything... covering, but not sinking in... making a mess of slippery slopes and roads we don't want to go down.

But I am reminded again and again to look up!

Look up! For your redemption draweth nigh...

And there it is. That hint of Hope that the Light has come and darkness will never overtake it! 

It's in that moment that we remember...

Darkness never wins! Light is always dawning... coming for us... and while darkness may seem to be getting darker, the Light is ever increasing and it is shining brighter and brighter as His Glory and Love are put on display for all to see.

We do Him proud when we let Love win.

Satisfied from Wanting Yet Longing For More - a Five Minute Friday Post

I promise I will find my rhythm again and return to my regularly scheduled program of partying it up on Twitter on Thursday nights with my #fmfparty tribe but for now...

--Sickness has me like:

Actually... I am feeling MUCH much better today... I just still sound a little like I'm dying! 

This is Five Minute Friday (- a five minute timed free write) and our One Word Prompt for the day is: WANT

{GO}

My first thought goes to Psalm 23... because, of course!

Or more like: because, I've been reminiscing!

You see, I immediately thought back to reading this psalm to our girlie when she was itty bitty and she stopped me before I even got to verse two!

"The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want..."

You know how it goes. But to a toddler this sounds like, for some reason, David is saying he doesn't want God. 

I loved her curiosity! I loved that she would stop me mid-sentence and wonder why... why in the world would someone not want God?

So we explained it slow... assuring her that what this verse means is that God is so good, that we never are in want.

But that can sound like a fairy tale or a lie... because we all want something, right? 

There is always something or someone or somewhere just out of our reach and our hope and desire is wrapped around wanting... except when there isn't. It's possible to experience times when there really is no want...

--And that's the thing!

What Happens in Vegas...

I know... 

Honestly, I do!  If you know me us then you know that Vegas is not really our deal.  I mean, we love to travel and to see new places and new things but Vegas hasn't ever been on our radar as a desired destination! 

And yet... there we were --all three of us, taking off from Seattle, Vegas-bound!

I wrote about it earlier... how it all started off as a joke! How my girlie and I talked of being like Lorelai and Rory, and celebrating her 21st birthday Gilmore Girls-style.  But life happened, and time (as it does) got away from us and I forgot to plan it all out and I forgot to hope that she would even want to.

But when she asked, as if she really did still want to hang out with her Mama in Las Vegas, well... God showed up, leaving signs that He was all in, (Ya see what I did there?) and we put a trip together real quick like!

When Haven and Home Have No Street Address... A Five Minute Friday post

I know... I totally missed last week because of vacation and this week I planned a walk, only to get home just in time to party over on Twitter --except that we had a meeting at our house that had completely slipped my mind! I blame it on Vegas. (I may be doing that for awhile!) 

This is Five Minute Friday (- a five minute timed free write) and our One Word Prompt for the day is: HAVEN

{GO}

My first instinct is to look up the official definition because, who really uses this word anymore, right? But it's so dreamy and romantic... I think we should use it all. the. time.

Definition of haven:

1:  harbor, port

2:  a place of safety : refuge

3:  a place offering favorable opportunities or conditions

I mean, come on... right? Swoon-worthy, for sure!

Earlier this week, I was thinking of what Home means to me... and I think Home and Haven are (or should be) pretty much the same thing!

What I Learned in (April and) May...

Somehow I entirely missed this post for April. Clearly I must have been learning lots of things because I failed to take time to reflect and write it all down? I will try to combine April and May while still keeping the list fun and relatively short! We'll see how we do!

***

12 Random Things That I Have Learned...

When Small Wonders Add Up To Kingdom

This past weekend was full... as in, super full.  

But it was filled with all kinds of blessings and so much honor! None of it felt bossy at all!

I'm gonna do this post old school... a throwback of sorts to Multitudes on Mondays or #1000gifts!

Because... well, 
I introvert on Mondays. Hard. 

And last weekend was full and blessed and it involved all kinds of extroverting, so we're gonna keep this short! Plus - Vacation!  Yep... we are leaving town in just a couple of days so there is all of that prep work that must get done, too!

We started off Friday night with a Wedding Rehearsal... way  (read: way, way, WAY...) out in the country... you know, where the buffalo roam.

When We Believe, But Do Not Expect... A Five Minute Friday post.

Once again I managed to have a meeting scheduled for Thursday night. This means I was only at the Twitter party for a few minutes, but oh how I love to pop in, even if only for a few!

This is Five Minute Friday (- a five minute timed free write) and our One Word Prompt for the day is: EXPECT

{GO}

If I would stop and just do the math, (...which I will not!) I would tell you that this past week -- it has cost us, my friends!

Things just kept breaking down (or catching on fire) and adding up and I was given ample 'opportunity' to worry and stress!

It was put before me and just when I felt justified to give in, I heard the Lord whisper loud in my ear,

"You CAN choose that route. But that's not the way I would go. You can worry and stress and let fear stroll right in to wreak havoc... OR... Or you can choose the path I would take! It's up to you!"

So, instead of letting the numbers add up quick and drown me in all those worse case scenarios that eat away at our peace, I decided to follow His lead and simply do this:

Choose to Trust.
Easy Peasy, right? 
Except when it's not!

I realized that I believe for a lot of things, but sometimes I forget to follow through with expectation!

Just when I was ready to give in and give up, He whispered soft, "Beloved, don't lose heart!" and I felt faith rising up... and not only that, but a sense of anticipation and expectation... I began to imagine what it could look like if He came through!

When Life Comes at You Hard... A Small Wonders Post

Y'all...? I mean... 

Last week, after weeks and weeks of thinking, praying, and second-guessing ourselves, we bit the bullet and booked three flights... a (not quite) impromptu birthday trip to take with our girlie for her twenty first birthday. (Hold me.)

And here's the thing: we are not gamblers... (clearly.)  

We are not impulse buyers or spontaneous travelers and while this particular trip started as a joke and an ode to Gilmore Girls, it began to feel actually somehow important. Necessary even. 

What?  
I know...

I know how silly crazy that sounds because we are not doing anything huge... no overseas flights or Kingdom centered plans. No.  We are going to Vegas. We are looking forward to a pool and an umbrella drink. We want to see the lights and relax together... to drink in something new while strolling side by side by side.  All of us... together. We want to see the Grand Canyon and make some more memories for our little family of three... long road trips, private jokes, laughing at nothing and everything, holding hands... we want that. We want all of it... and so even though we don't really have a vacation budget we decided last minute(-ish) to just go for it! We'd never regret the trip and God provides and so we clicked Book Now and I'm not even joking with you, less than 48hours later we hear two horrible very bad words strung together: New Transmission.

Yeah. That.