Well, I missed ya'll last week! I have been somewhat out of commission. I titled this blank post last Tuesday, with plans to write it all out slow and edited, and link up with Holley Gerth and Jennifer Dukes Lee last Wednesday...
I had felt led to write about my OneWord (Vision) and yet, woke up Tuesday only to find floaters that were too many and too centered to work around while looking at a computer screen. Yes... ironic!
I want to write about Vision... and I Can. Not. See.
I sit here and I stare at this bright screen... trying to see beyond 'things' that mark my vision and blur my focus and it can be exhausting and frustrating and what I really want is clarity in what I should be looking for, not so much on what I am seeing. (and healing... I am looking for and wanting healing... because, of course!)
I close my eyes so I can see...
I sit back, and I breathe Him in.
He whispers again, softly... He is drawing me in, pulling me closer and I remember - yes - remember, yet again, that it is not so much what I am seeing as it is what I am knowing... what I am becoming, that clears my vision and (re)awakens my dreams. What I should be looking for, well - Him... the answer is always Him!
It's when my eyes are closed, but my heart is spread out wide open that I recall how I see most clearly. It's with His eyes and His heart that I see what is most important. I can focus in on what His call is for me in this day when my eyes are set on Him. One day at a time... moment by moment, I lean in to all He has for me and it doesn't take a bossy list or a step-by-step master plan (although... well, I digress.) As I lean in to Him, eyes closed, clarity unfolding, the distractions fade away slowly... just scurrying off to the sides at first, but then - in the thickness of His Presence, they lose their appeal and they no longer grab hold for my attention!
It's when I can catch a faint scent of the fragrance of Christ that I find myself tuning in to the senses He has given... I lean in, and breath deep, and I remember that He is here - whether I can see Him or not.
He smells like Sweetness and Sensual all at once and I remember that He is in hot pursuit and He is the air that I breathe and the perfume that I want to linger after I leave a room. I drink Him in and He is surrounding me, filling me once again up and over to overflowing and I want to spill Him out wherever I go. I can hear His breathing - it's pouring into me and it feels like Life, and it sounds like a song of love, softly humming.
Vision is returning, refocusing, re-energized, even if when I open these earthly eyes, my sight is not (yet) healed.
My Vision... my OneWord... it is more than just one thing. I admit that when the word first stirred in me, these seeing problems in the natural came to mind. I didn't want to embrace Vision as mine, for fear that the enemy would - well, do what he is doing right now in attacking my sight. Still - as much as I want these eyes to see... I want this heart to see more... to feel more... to be more... I want the beating of my heart to sound like Jesus. And so I lean in... I close my eyes, and I trust.
Ah yes... there it is. I trust.
And I count on...
#1961 - A house FILLED with family... (both of my Sissys and their families are here!)
#1962 - A pregnant Wunki (my niece) & a soon-to-be-here Great Nephew!
#1963 - Fresh Juice... (Carrot, Apple, Beet, and Ginger is my Go To!)
#1964 - An old friend stopping by for a visit... a welcomed surprise drop in!
#1965 - Sunshine... always welcome, but especially after a long cold winter!
#1966 - Helping hands in last minute setting up for a party.
#1967 - Getting past that silent awkward start of a gathering of people who do not really know each other! (All Baby Showers start off like this, yes?)
#1968 - Precious Tiny Baby Clothes!
#1969 - Cake!
#1970 - Family Walks at Sunset...
#1971 - Sunsets that are happening later and later! (Thank You, Jesus!)
#1972 - Daisies in glass Jars...
#1973 - Playing Heads Up on the iPhone around a full table with lots of laughter!
#1972 - 'Seeing' more clearly - even if healing has not yet come!
Linking up this week with the lovelies over at A Holy Experience with Ann Voskamp for
Multitudes on Mondays:
Also linking up with OneWord365:
So... what about you? What are you counting? What are you truly SEEING right now? I find it not surprising that as I laid down Self Doubt for Lent, the Love Idol that is like an umbrella for all my other idols, I am feeling blind - and yet, I am seeing ever more clearly!