It is true... I am alive and well and this update is long overdue!
I do not have very many faithful readers of this blog and since my weekly meetings took the summer off, I fell out of the habit of posting on a regular basis here. However, this does not mean that God is not speaking... He desires to speak to me, and to you, in every season of our lives and the skill we must learn is how to hear Him in the midst of busy times, as well as calm and peaceful times. I really felt over the summer that the Lord had asked me to simply enjoy the time with my family and to relax and have fun. Now, for some - that concept alone sounds so - well, unspiritual! However, God loves us and wants us to drink in every season and experience every blessing. For me, among my most treasured gifts and biggest blessings are my family! So I really relished in spending time with them! I am in love with my husband and enjoy being with him - and my teenager is (still!) an amazing joy to be around... I was able to erally drink this in and enjoy a lot of 'down time' with them! This summer was different somehow than any other... through out the summer months, I kept a focused determination to stay on track with overcoming my lack of follow through. As I have mentioned on this blog and elsewhere - God had ever so gently let me know that every barrier to my breakthroughs came from my own lack of follow through, through all of my life. That was consistently spoken and whispered to me for entire year of 2007. This year - Change has come and Victory is in sight!
I have felt a pull in my spirit and to be honest it has been difficult to know at times if I am on the right track. Yesterday, as I was walking with the Lord, I asked Him once again for confirmation that I am in fact headed in the right direction. You see - for years and years, I neglected areas of my life (i.e. disciplining my flesh/exercise) for more 'spiritual' endeavors. So - even though I knew that the Lord had called me to focus and get back on track in this area... I would feel torn between not having given as much time and focus to the Word or being more involved at church, etc. I have had this conversation with the Lord SEVERAL times throughout the past 8 months. He consistently lets me know that I am in fact following His lead. I used to joke that my weight was the final frontier that the enemy had me bound. Of course, as true as it was - it was not funny... and I am in no way thinking that once I overcome this - it'll all be easy! However, as I was walking with the Lord He reminded me of the call to focus, to overcome, to lean on Him... He showed me how even in this new determination, I was sowing good seed for a spiritual harvest - as well as a physical harvest! He was putting in me a new tenacity - and this new discipline will, in fact, bleed over to every area of my life! Whew... so - I felt as if He extended Grace to me and told me that He asked of me one year... to give one year of focus and hard work in overcoming the flesh and in staying the course. So - instead of getting caught up in the physical fleshly goals of weight loss and image... I have a renewed sense that whatever I lose, wherever I am by January or February of next year, I will be in line with all He has for me... I will then (if not before, really!) begin to see breakthrough in other areas of my life as well! Great Change requires great effort... and lasting change comes when it has cost you something... and as long as it is not costing me my relationship and intimacy with Him, I am staying the course! He also ever so gently reminded me that He asked of me one year for my Tuesday Prayer time and I grew comfortable there and ended up staying much longer (and in turn, not really doing much with the writing that He had called me to do here.)
So - my Tuesdays will be different this Fall. I am hosting a Bible study in my home on Mondays... we are going to go through Bill Johnsons' "The Supernatural Power of a transformed Mind: Access to a Life of Miracles" I am expecting BIG things from this study and am SO excited about it! I am also partnering up with a friend to pray on Thursdays... we both are called to prayer and we, too, are expecting BIG things from are prayer time together. In between those days - I am once again hoping to focus on two things: 1. My continued overcoming/follow through in regards to discipling the flesh, and 2. Writing.
At one point in my long 'debate' if you will with the Lord - I told Him once again how I would write or edit and proceed forward if He would just tell me what KIND of book to write. He reminded me that He did in fact tell me this months and months ago. I was reminded that in the midst of a Tuesday meeting, someone mentioned writing a Children's book. This had NEVER entered my mind. Not once. I have a heart for women and my ministry has always been to encourage and write for women... however, this is the most direct direction He has given and so I plan to work on a series of Children's books that will stem out of my Tuesday visions. Maybe, once I do this... He will release me to the writings here in a devotional form somehow to reach out to a broader audience. So - I covet your prayers of direction and inspiration as I attempt to wade out into the unknown waters of children's writing. This is definitely not familiar terrain!
I pledge however to not forget you all here... and plan to share glimpses of what He continues to speak to me, through my own prayer time, as well as through this exciting new Bible study we are starting in a few weeks!
Whatever Season you are in, please know that He loves you and desires to speak to you. He desires to help you up and out of Bondage and lead the way to Overcoming! This IS a year of Change and this is a Season of Suddenlies! I pray you experience Heavenly Suddenlies and Lasting Change!
In His Arms and On His Mind,
Will I Ever Feel Real Joy Again?
3 hours ago