April 29, 2019

Learning a New Dance... -A Five Minute Friday post.

***

Hey there, sweet readers! I hope you had a great Easter! I've been meaning to sit in this chair and write, but alas --Spring has sprung here and that means the return of Patio time and, Oh My Heart... I lose track of time out there! Plus somehow we found ourselves out of town over the weekend. Still... I'm back now and ready to write!

This is a Five Minute Friday post... which simply means I set a timer and free write for five minutes flat on the one-word prompt: TOUCH

{GO!}

I see the word and I laugh... just a little at first,
but then the Ah Ha giggle starts to build.

Because... Gah!


It's been a LONG time since I was a young new Mama...
and a LONG time since I mothered a toddler...
and a LONG time since I reached the end of the day
so dog-tired and completely drained...
and a LONG time since I had had my fill of touch
by 2pm and what I wanted most was just for
no one to even think of pulling on me
until the sun rose on a new morning!

Right? Anyone remember those days?
(Anyone living them right now?)

Fast forward some 20+ years and here we are!
Right back to All those Feels!


This Mimi, whose Love Languages are Words of Affirmation and Physical Touch, is purposely pouring into Lil Miss with everything I've got and I'm in my sweet spot when she's here! 

And yet as soon as she goes, this Introvert needs a hot minute and my poor hubby had forgotten those early parenting days and all the ways it changed our song and dance!

We are home together a lot of the time in this season and it's been such a gift! (Mostly!)

But here's the thing:
His job is school work and looking for a job
and mine is back to wiping noses and bottoms...
it's back to rocking to sleep and reading books
and singing songs and I am in NO WAY complaining!
However, by the end of the day
--this Grandma is spent and while we are
both fluent in our Love Languages... 
well, who knew that as an empty nester
I would want a little more space between us
from time to time simply because
little hands have already pulled
all the Love right on out of me
for most of the day...


I remembered this old familiar feeling
and only recently was able to pinpoint what it was.  

I didn't know to expect it once again! 

I didn't see it coming because being a grandparent is SO MUCH BETTER than being a parent! 

I didn't see it coming because
my heart melts and explodes
at the tiniest of looks or smiles or laughter
or gestures that speak volumes
when her words are not yet
coming out clearly!  

When she uses sign language to speak,
I get what she wants right away. 
When she throws her arms up or
squeezes them tightly in my direction,
wanting to be held or cuddled
or picked up or danced with...
when her little hand reaches for my finger
to guide me to where she wants to go,
or her little hands cup my face
and she leans in for a hug or kiss
or she is just wanting direct eye contact
for a moment or two of connection
--she gets what she wants!

But it has helped to take notice
of the familiarity of this draining feeling
at the end of the day.
The feeling of needing to not be touched
or needed or even wanted for just a little bit
in order for my introverted heart
to be refreshed and refilled yet again.

I remember that in the past,
we found a new rhythm... 
We learned a new dance that kept us close
but gave my Mama Heart a little room
to breathe on its own.


And, thank God, we are
learning new dances still... 

{STOP!}

I have reminded My Honey of those early parenthood days and explained that Touch is still one of the most important ways we communicate with each other and yet, I am fully aware that --especially by Day 3-- I just need a few minutes to quiet and to calm.  

He laughs because --his pastor heart is never too tired to reach out and touch, but he gets me. It took us some years to find the right words to communicate -but he gets how I am wired and we learned a dance years ago that included steps that led me to a quiet set-apart space but also included steps that led him to a room full of people to love!

I'm so grateful to be able to be so hands-on with our granddaughter and I'm so thankful that she truly is so sweet and nurturing herself... I can't tell you how many times a day I swoop her up and hold her close and whisper truth and love into her ears and her spirit! 

She knows she is loved... 
just like her Lil Mama did before her!

But the Lord reminded me
just like He did all those years ago
during my first rodeo like this--
He reminded me to do what I need to do
to fill back up so I am not an empty Empty Nester!


For my marriage is and always has been first...
It was us two becoming one before it was ever
us two becoming three!

Do you know your Love Language, friends? 

It's oh so helpful to know your own as well as for those in your family! If you aren't sure, you can take a quick online quiz that will help you discover how you most give and receive Love to and from those around you!  

Check it out HERE. It's free! 
I'd love to hear what your Love Language is!
(My Top Two are super close and they are: Words of Affirmation and Physical Touch!)

Linking up with  Kate Motaung and the #fmfparty Community today.  Five Minute Fridays give us the chance to dive right in and share what He puts on our hearts! Click HERE to read what others have to say about "TOUCH"

The FMF lowdown: The gathering happens on Twitter on Thursday nights & then we write our hearts out & hit publish all over the interwebs on Thursday & Friday (& sometimes on Tuesdays!) It's where we encourage & uplift... where we share prayer requests & praise reports... where we talk about food & friends & we find support & kindred hearts. It's where we are reminded that life is good & God is good & we're not alone... & then we all write for five minutes flat, a flash mob of wordsmiths letting our hearts & our fingers do the talking tapping & we hit publish before we can second-guess it all away. We'd love to have you join us!

Photos courtesy of Unsplash

I'm also linking up with the lovely writer community linked below:

Crystal Twaddell for #FreshMarketFriday

Mary Geisen for #TellHisStory

Kelly Balarie for #RaRaLinkUp

2 comments :

  1. Like you, when my three little grandchildren leave I am tired, my back hurts but my cup "runneth over!" Who knew the blessings that would come from being a Nana?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh, exactly! It's the BEST kind of tired! Thanks so much for stopping by, Shanancy!

      Delete

Thanks so much for stopping by! I always love to hear your thoughts! Remember to: Speak Life - Be Love - Shine On!
~Karrilee~

Blog Archive